I was with my mother (father from this lifetime) at some kind of doctors surgery. I was in my late 20's, around 26 I believe. I feel this started as a 'normal check up and I fit the bill for some kind of research they needed to do. My mother was led out of the room, helpless to do anything and I was left there, absolutely terrified. I was examined and even at that age, in those times, I had never shown my body to a man before and here I was being inspected by a small group of them!
At the beginning I cried and I screamed. I begged for mercy, but by the end of my time there I was disconnected and devoid of all feeling.
Memories of those I loved were running through my mind. My best friend (mother this lifetime), my sister and older brother (daughter and son this lifetime).
One of the older uniformed men tried to get through to me and be friendly. He had such soft sad eyes. 'We are not all bad you know,' he said as I cowered in the corner. He reached into his pocket and gave me a heart shaped stone of some kind. As he did so, I saw a flash of him as a younger man and recognised him as my husband from this lifetime.
I was then shown an experience from my current lifetime where I was out exploring with a group of cousins and friends. We visited an aunty I didn't know. I had never liked her and although she was sweet and kind, I was cross with her and scared of her at the same time. I was shown that she was one of the men who had 'operated' on me. It is important that I share this story with you to remind you that we are continually surrounded by our soul family. Sometimes they get the 'shit' assignments, where they are cruel to us. Sometimes they only play a bit part, but often, they are the nucleus we find within each lifetime. Its harder to love them when they are bad or mean, and they knew that when they 'agreed to their assignment'. Our soul mate can be anyone within our life, a good friend, a lover, a sibling, a parent, or maybe someone who helps us to believe that there is good in our life. Sometimes our 'gut feeling' of someone isn't because they are bad or wrong in this lifetime, but because they left a huge impression in another.
For me, this has opened my eyes to my fixation with Hitler as a teen, my fear of hospitals, drugs and needles, the cancer I developed at around 26, where it was and how panicked I was, until they explained what would happen and why (I refused to allow them to anesthetise me until it was explained in full - much to their frustration of those in theater!). Even hearing about nazi Germany makes me feel physically sick to my stomach, but I know that they were all a symptom of their times, just as we are of ours.
As I lay there, afterwards, I sent healing to my past lifetime and all concerned. I asked for healing to myself, to remove the physical, emotional and soul-ular scars that I have brought in with me. I asked for integration of that lifetime into my present one. Healing a past life isn't about deleting it or fixing it. It is about accepting it and knowing it is a part if who you are, regardless of the person you were at that time. Healing a past life isn't about judgement. It is about acceptance and love.
with love, respect and integrity
Cherie xx