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Whats a 'Pain in the Neck' Between Friends?!

21/5/2014

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For a long time now Karen and I have noticed that when we are together, I have felt a sharp pain in my neck, almost as if I have had a cut to the back of my head. We have often joked about how she probably chopped my head off in a past life. It never seems to happen when we aren't together. Yesterday it happened while we were having morning tea with a friend. I had a severe jolt to the back of my neck as we chatted. Karen and I laughed, as we usually did, and then she apologised. We explained to our perplexed friend what we thought was the issue and she asked if I had ever done a past life reading on Karen. Sometimes we get so busy doing for other people that we forget to see what could be happening right in front of our nose - obviously a past life issue that needed addressing.
Today it happened again, but this one was slightly different. As Karen said the word 'pain' and clapped her hands, I felt a sharp pain and then a strange sensation as if my head was going to fall off. This was accompanied with a visual of where the axe had separated my head from my body.
Karen and I got my pendulum and decided to explore it further. Amidst much laughing and irreverent comments and questions, we established that Karen had indeed, been my executioner in a past life. I was a young girl of around 14-16 years old. I was executed as a way for the 'powers that be' of that time to be able to control my parents, who were drowned not long after they had witnessed my demise. I could see my parents, the same ones I have in this lifetime, watching in horror, as the axe was raised, and fell, ending my young life.

Of course Karen was horrified that she had killed a friend (that would be me ☺) that she had from this lifetime.
We discussed whether I would stop getting this sensation now that we had discovered the cause and released the past life issue that we had been making fun of for months. However, I could still feel a tightening around the place where the axe had hit...so we decided we needed to venture further into the story with my pendulum.
We discovered that I had not committed an actual crime, apart from being the daughter of my parents, who obviously weren't behaving in the way the 'Magistrate' wanted them to.
After a little more probing, we discovered that in that lifetime, the executioner had loved me (well, what can I say? I am definitely a loveable type!) and had been forced to execute me on the orders of the town's Chancellor, who then arranged for my executioner to be killed afterwards. (this made Karen feel a little better knowing she played a reluctant part in my death). Apparently he had resigned his axe sometime earlier, but the Chancellor insisted that he wield the axe one last time, no doubt for obscure reasons of his own.
This event happened in Russia during the seventeenth century.
The ache disappeared after we had learned this, so we felt we had learned all we needed to know about that particular lifetime. We discussed, and joked, about the event, taking away the power it once held, and integrated it into our 'knowing'.
Had we not explored it fully, we may have only got half the story and not recognised that Karen wasn't an active participant in my execution. We may have missed a vital piece of information that could have affected our soulular memory of that time.
Working with pendulums can be so much fun, especially when you are able to isolate an issue and work out what is causing it; the thought patterns and beliefs we have brought in with us. Looking back, I can see that on a personal level, I have always been waiting for Karen to 'stop being my friend' or to 'cut me off', without really understanding why. I wonder if I knew in that lifetime my executioner/love had no other option but to play the role he did. I am assuming not, given this irrational thought I have carried with me about expecting Karen to turn away.
I wonder how often we carry about perceptions and beliefs we have brought in from other lifetimes that affect how we view our lives and relationships
in this one.
with love, respect and integrity
Cherie xx



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Why should we live within the silence of fear

5/5/2014

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I never felt that I fit in as a child. I always hoped to reach that beautiful space in my life as an adult where everyone would realise that I actually did. It never really happened. As a young child, other children teased me because I was 'different'. The things that they believed were important just didn't interest me. The teachers didn't like the way I asked questions, or corrected their spelling - apparently children aren't meant to want to seek more information, or know more than an adult.
I found it difficult to conform. I liked to do things in a way that suited me, and although we all ended up in the same place whether it was a project, assignment or just normal classwork, it simply wasn't allowed. My teachers liked to make me 'undo' what I had achieved on my own, so that I could work at the same pace as everyone else. I was made fun of by the adults who were meant to be guiding me, so it inevitably followed that the other children picked up on the vibe and began harassing me.
I was a good student, but that didn't count for much with my teachers. Being an A student didn't make up for the fact that they couldn't relate to me or force me to conform to the sheep mentality everyone else was happy to follow.
I buried myself in my school work and pretended I didn't care....but I did!
I felt I couldn't tell anyone, because who would believe a kid who says their teacher is bullying them, making them look foolish in front of other children and generally making their life a misery. Nothing I did was right or good enough. I hated school and I hated my life.

Every time I was called up to the front of the class, I would feel physically ill, the room would spin and I would  be so scared I would be engulfed in this horrible black energy that surrounded me.All that suppressing of emotion made me feel ill. I made excuses to stay home. I would put my fingers down my throat and make myself sick, so I wouldn't have to go in and face those horrible bullies, both in and out of the classroom.
I became withdrawn. I had no friends, but instead of telling my parents, I would pretend I was meeting them down at their place...and I would sit in the strawberry patch over the road until I felt enough time had gone by for me to say I had been sent home as they were going out.
This went on for years. I began to develop physical symptoms. I had headaches, my stomach ached and churned, and my hair even began to fall out. I felt depressed, even though I had no idea what that meant in those days. I can remember one day after school feeling very much alone and thinking I should just 'stop the pain' of my life....until I looked at all the things I would miss if I did that. I thought about my parents and grandparents, who all loved me. I wondered how they would feel if I wasn't here anymore. I cried as I realised how sad they would be, especially because they didn't know why I felt this way or what was making me so sad.
That was a turning point for me. I realised I didn't need to do this alone, that I could talk to someone and I could ask others for help. Just because I was a child didn't mean that no one would listen to me. That night I talked to my parents and explained what was happening at school and how alone I felt.
Sharing felt good...and it did good. Not only was I able to see that my parents believed in me, but also that they were prepared to fight for me. That night I learned that bullying only continues if no one knows about it.
And so it is with life. We all run into bullies of some kind, no matter what we do. We believe they have the power to make us feel small or insignificant, when really, they only have that power because we 'give' it to them. For some the power of being able to make others feel small is how they begin to feel strong and powerful. Bullies are a lot like balloons. If we refuse to give them that 'power', they lose all that hot air that resides within, that same hot air that feeds off our fear, and they deflate. The more we speak of bullying and bullies, the less they can comfortably exist. No matter what stage of life we are at, we need to say 'NO' to bullying and allow others to see what is happening, so changes can be made.
with love, respect and integrity
Cherie xx

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