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History Repeats and Releases

20/12/2013

1 Comment

 
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About 20 years ago, I developed a back injury. At the time I was unhappy in my 'going nowhere' job, but I didn't have the guts to take that leap of faith and resign.
The Universe stepped in. As I was lifting an empty box, I felt a twang in the back of my heel. Nothing painful, it felt as if someone had snapped a rubber band and flicked the back of my foot. After a couple of days of strange tingling sensations, I decided to go and see the doctor. The doctor could see nothing major wrong with me, although he did mention one leg was slightly shorter than the other. As such he couldn't refer me to a specialist, so he suggested I try a few of his 'other colleagues' to see if we could resolve the issue. First I went to a physiotherapist, who insisted I should be able to put my feet behind my ears, and did his utmost best to prove it was true. He would push my leg straight up and lean into me with all his weight. He called me a wimp as I cried tears of pain. After two visits, I had had enough of him and went back to the doctor.
Next I visited a reflexologist, who, as it turned out was much more interested in replacing his mistress, as she would be moving soon. (His wife was his receptionist and only in the next room! Tact, much?) One visit was enough to give this charlatan a wide berth...and a good thing too, now that I am older and wiser and realise that never once did he touch my feet!
By this time I was getting shooting pains down the back of my legs and experiencing alternating bouts of numbness and sharp pain in my right heel. My doctor suggested an acupuncturist. Bad idea! It turns out that needles and I didn't work so well together. I would stagger home bleeding and bruised after each appointment. In those days I didn't have the balls to say I wasn't returning, so it took five visits before I 'grew' some. On my fifth visit, he told me he was very excited because he was going to teach some new students and could he video me to demonstrate how to do the needles. He said I merely needed to agree it hurt every spot he touched. Some time later I was very much a pincushion, he packed up his video camera and took it to the other end of the office. I lay there for an interminably long time, waiting for him to return and remove the needles, my bladder sending me urgent messages. Did I call out? Not on your life! About 50 minutes later he walked past the door and said 'Are you still here? You can get dressed and leave.' I won't tell you what I said, but let me tell you, he was my first lesson in knowing what was right for me, what was wrong, and saying 'My body. My choice.' Prior to that, I had believed anyone in a white coat was an authority on my body.
As I stumbled across to the other side of the road, one of the shop owners suggested I stop going there, as I seemed to stagger over and almost crawl back. Not a good advertisement they said jokingly. There was no way I was ever going back anyway.
After that, I began having issues with my nerve endings and lower back pain. The doctor, telling me he still couldn't refer me, suggested I go to his osteopath friend. Ahhh, how naive I was in those days.... I assumed an osteopath was like a remedial massage therapist - no body cracking here!
About ten minutes into my appointment, the whole street would have heard how surprised I was when he picked me up and 'dropped me', cracking and I was almost certain, demolishing my spine. My friend kindly told me that she had heard the expletive I screamed out from the coffee shop next door! Thats what friends are for, apparently!
By the time I went to see the doctor again, I was struggling to walk. My back was aching continually and he had to prescribe me some pain killers and anti inflammatory tablets to help me get through the day.
By the time I did manage to get a referral to see a specialist, I was wearing a brace 24 hours a day, having to wear heel pads to avoid the nauseous feeling I got while walking, on extremely strong pain killers and unable to walk/stand or sit for any period of time. I couldn't wear shoes with 'backs' on them, and certainly no heels. All the 'work' everybody had done on me had exacerbated my problem. I was told I was but a fine line away from being in a wheel chair.
Now I'm not telling you all this to get sympathy, I am merely trying to set the scene for you.
Although I managed to make improvement to my lifestyle with exercise, etc, I was still in a bad way. I still wore my special heel pads, everywhere...
About ten years later, thanks to some synchronistic opportunity, I met a past life healer. I decided I would 'give it a whirl'. The first visit, she told me about a past life when I had worked in Egypt and helped to build the pyramids. A large slab had slipped and sliced off the back of my right heel. This made sense to me, when I considered the alternating pain and numbness of my heel. The healer told me I would feel a marked improvement the next day. I was skeptical to say the least and wasn't surprised when it hadn't improved as completely as she had told me it would. A week later I was looking at one of my old dream notebooks and found an entry I had written when I was in my twenties. I was a young boy in Egypt, with aspirations of being an architect. I would draw in the fading light on whatever I could. The dream confirmed other facts the healer had mentioned, which was awesome and mind boggling!
I had another past life healing and we talked about my dream and a few other pertinent details that obviously needed to address.
The next morning I woke up and bolted out of bed, remembering I had visitors coming soon and I needed to do some baking. I raced down to the supermarket, and was halfway around before I realised I could feel the sensation of my thong under my heel. Anyone watching me would have seen this woman with a dopey smile on her face, as she 'walked with intention'.
So, just in case you didn't work it out, I never wore the heel pads again. I had only been taking the medication periodically at that stage...I have never taken it again. My point is, all the medical professionals in the world couldn't fix the problem with  my heel, because it was a soulular and cellular memory. My body/soul remembered this past life injury and had replicated it around the same age that it had happened within that lifetime. I didn't need to spend masses of money, dedicate half my life meditating or be healed over a period of years. All I needed to do was acknowledge that this was my truth, to release my old way of being and thinking, to allow that past life with all its issues, to just 'be' and let them go.
We have been here many times. We have specific memories that we hold onto, that may be holding us back, whether its an injury or a vow we have taken during that lifetime. By discovering what happened in a prior lifetime, we are better able to understand why we act or feel certain ways within our present journey.
with love, respect and integrity
Cherie xx


1 Comment
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