Part One:
After receiving devastating news from my surgeon that she could not cure me from stage 3 ovarian cancer, I was left with no option but to begin my own journey of healing. You see, there is a difference between curing and healing. Curing is the elimination of the signs and symptoms of illness, whereas healing is becoming whole, by getting to the root cause of what created the illness and identifying with our spiritual selves.
Albert Einstein said "The only real valuable thing is intuition" and having been an intuitive healer myself for a long time, I was being put to the test. My intuition was what would guide me on my journey.
I told my surgeon I did not want to know my prognosis; not that I was in denial but I knew how highly suggestible the sub-conscious mind is. This is especially so in a state of trauma, and it is through the sub-conscious that healing takes place. Let's face it, if I was able to trust my conscious mind, I wouldn't have got cancer in the first place.
Of course like anyone else that is diagnosed with cancer I was afraid; well actually that's not altogether true, I was petrified. Fear was my constant companion, as I shook like a leaf from sun up to sun down….until one morning I was abruptly woken by a voice that gently informed me I was healed. This was followed by a sense of peace that permeated every cell in my body. I could breathe easily, as the knot that gripped my stomach like a vice, released its fierce hold. The knowledge of having been healed was believed in my subconscious, and now my conscious mind, but there was much I needed to do in order for my physical body to believe it too.
From this state of peace, it was easier for me to follow my intuition and give myself the best possible chance.
And so my journey began. I needed help and I totally trusted that help would come to me. The first "sign" came when my surgeon added, after she said she couldn't cure me: "......and you can't cure you, but between the two of us I believe you are an A1 student". We had previously talked about the power of the mind and she knew I was following a spiritual path to healing. I thought this was a very profound statement coming from someone in mainstream medicine.
Following my diagnosis I had four weeks before my operation and I got to work straight away. I had not long finished a book called Jeshua Channelings by Pamela Kribbe and in it she said: "All diseases have a spiritual origin. Understanding the spiritual meaning of the illness is a process. It is a quest, an inner journey on which you gradually restore the communication process. Part of the communication is being restored by your willingness, your patience and determination to take this inner journey". (www.jeshua.net). I had all three: willingness, patience and determination.
Rome wasn't built in a day so I decided to allow GOD (which I do not refer to in a religious sense but as an acronym for Grand Order of Design) to bring to me, at the right time and in the right order, what I needed to learn and do in order to heal.
I looked at how this disease was presenting itself to me. It was gradually growing until eventually it reached the size of a rock melon. It was reaching out to be noticed, and, as I hadn't been listening to my body and soul - my body did what it had to do in order to be get my attention. Like a child, wanting the attention of it's mother, where the child gets louder and louder, until a full blown drama develops - this is where I was heading - a drama of catastrophic, life threatening proportions.
I decided the best way to uncover what my body was trying to tell me was to ask it. Quietening myself down, I offered up a prayer that I was ready to embark on this journey of healing, and to ask for everything I needed to know in order for complete healing to take place. As I listened carefully, my body began to whisper to me what it had longed to share with me years ago.
"Jenny" it said "you look good, you feel great but something isn't right inside. You need to drop down your guard, as the veneer is cracking. You can't keep it all together any longer".
As my body spoke to me I thanked it for pointing out that I was ignoring it and my soul's true needs. I quietly made an agreement to be true to myself and dig deep to uncover what was festering under the surface, so I could live a life of being true to myself. I would no longer pretend that everything was alright, because it obviously wasn't. At some level there was something seriously out of alignment.
That night before I retired to bed I decided to get some guidance from Doreen Virtue's Messages from your Angels Oracle Cards and to my amazement I intuitively chose the following cards.
Mystique - keep charging ahead and don't take no for an answer. Expect miraculous solutions to appear.
Indriel - You are a light worker. God needs you to shine your Divine light and love - like an angel - upon earth and all of its inhabitants.
Archangel Raphael - I am helping you heal physical challenges in yourself and others you are a healer like me.
Well I couldn't have orchestrated this reading if I tried! I went to bed for a restful night's sleep, knowing I had just received some very valuable "signs".
The following morning, which was in December 2012, I rose and turned on my computer to see an email which read:
ALL YOUR WISHES CAN COME TRUE IN 2013
On the last days of the year forces from beyond are going to be coming into contact with our world and making it possible for amazing miracles to be accomplished: And for you what that means is an opportunity to be granted a great favour: nothing less than fulfilment of all your wishes for the coming year of 2013. So I think you will agree that this is an important and even essential moment for you if you hope to get everything you want next year.
This extremely special time is viewed by all mediums as a magical night. The high energies that are going to be guiding the year 2013 will be concentrated on that night, and the vibration rate will be so powerful that, in terms of magic, anything can happen.
Hallelujah. What a message and certainly confirmation I was on track!
A part of me was still uncertain whether I could heal myself or not. I was still needing more confirmation, so a few days later, whilst lying on the couch at my parent's place, I was looking out the window and I asked for a sign that I was going to heal. Ten minutes later a car pulled up outside with WELLS sign written in huge letters on the side.
It was time to get to the root cause of what created this cancer and with the support of a dear friend, through guided meditation, I uncovered what it was. I was immediately transported back to a past life in France in the 1500's, I felt abject terror as a scene unfolded, revealing that I was being held captive in a cold dark dungeon. As I gazed upwards, daylight seeped through a tiny barred opening, and the muffled chatter of a large crowd gathering above in the village square drifted in. I was not alone in my cell, there were three younger people with me and one of them I recognised was my son in this lifetime. These young ones were my understudies. I was a healer and had been teaching them. In those times this was illegal and thought of as a threat. Healers were seen as people with power, and therefore, feared by the Kings and dignitaries. The solution was to round up healers and make an example of them, by burning them at the stake. I was forced to watch, as one by one, my understudies were burnt before it was finally my turn. No wonder I felt totally responsible for our demise.
This information was such a revelation to me. I understood how I had carried this experience through into this lifetime. During this lifetime I had experienced physical, emotional and sexual abuse and had maintained a deep seated belief that it was all my fault. When these abuses took place, I blamed myself and felt guilty. Consequently I had lived my life putting others' needs before my own. I was the "good" girl, always "trying" to do my best in every situation, without knowing what I wanted. I was forever looking for approval from others, always trying to make things right for everyone else. I totally understood why I developed ovarian cancer. Our ovaries are where we create life and, because of the abuse I had endured, I had shut down the ability to create a life for me and my needs.
Several days following my past life regression I received an email containing a guided meditation about entering the Hall of Records to access the soul's plan. I saw this email as divine assistance and followed the meditation where it was confirmed that my soul had contracted the cancer in order for me to learn to heal myself. I was then to teach others how to heal .
I received much divine inspired guidance, I came to understand that negative thoughts depress the immune system, whereas positive thoughts activate it. This means if you have unresolved grief, resentment, anger or any negative emotions which are caused by negative thoughts, you are highly likely to produce chemicals to suppress immune function. Conversely having hope, laughing and feeling good releases chemicals to improve the immune system. I chose to feel good, whenever possible, to help my immune system do its job.
Part Two will follow next week: The Operation and Beyond.
After receiving devastating news from my surgeon that she could not cure me from stage 3 ovarian cancer, I was left with no option but to begin my own journey of healing. You see, there is a difference between curing and healing. Curing is the elimination of the signs and symptoms of illness, whereas healing is becoming whole, by getting to the root cause of what created the illness and identifying with our spiritual selves.
Albert Einstein said "The only real valuable thing is intuition" and having been an intuitive healer myself for a long time, I was being put to the test. My intuition was what would guide me on my journey.
I told my surgeon I did not want to know my prognosis; not that I was in denial but I knew how highly suggestible the sub-conscious mind is. This is especially so in a state of trauma, and it is through the sub-conscious that healing takes place. Let's face it, if I was able to trust my conscious mind, I wouldn't have got cancer in the first place.
Of course like anyone else that is diagnosed with cancer I was afraid; well actually that's not altogether true, I was petrified. Fear was my constant companion, as I shook like a leaf from sun up to sun down….until one morning I was abruptly woken by a voice that gently informed me I was healed. This was followed by a sense of peace that permeated every cell in my body. I could breathe easily, as the knot that gripped my stomach like a vice, released its fierce hold. The knowledge of having been healed was believed in my subconscious, and now my conscious mind, but there was much I needed to do in order for my physical body to believe it too.
From this state of peace, it was easier for me to follow my intuition and give myself the best possible chance.
And so my journey began. I needed help and I totally trusted that help would come to me. The first "sign" came when my surgeon added, after she said she couldn't cure me: "......and you can't cure you, but between the two of us I believe you are an A1 student". We had previously talked about the power of the mind and she knew I was following a spiritual path to healing. I thought this was a very profound statement coming from someone in mainstream medicine.
Following my diagnosis I had four weeks before my operation and I got to work straight away. I had not long finished a book called Jeshua Channelings by Pamela Kribbe and in it she said: "All diseases have a spiritual origin. Understanding the spiritual meaning of the illness is a process. It is a quest, an inner journey on which you gradually restore the communication process. Part of the communication is being restored by your willingness, your patience and determination to take this inner journey". (www.jeshua.net). I had all three: willingness, patience and determination.
Rome wasn't built in a day so I decided to allow GOD (which I do not refer to in a religious sense but as an acronym for Grand Order of Design) to bring to me, at the right time and in the right order, what I needed to learn and do in order to heal.
I looked at how this disease was presenting itself to me. It was gradually growing until eventually it reached the size of a rock melon. It was reaching out to be noticed, and, as I hadn't been listening to my body and soul - my body did what it had to do in order to be get my attention. Like a child, wanting the attention of it's mother, where the child gets louder and louder, until a full blown drama develops - this is where I was heading - a drama of catastrophic, life threatening proportions.
I decided the best way to uncover what my body was trying to tell me was to ask it. Quietening myself down, I offered up a prayer that I was ready to embark on this journey of healing, and to ask for everything I needed to know in order for complete healing to take place. As I listened carefully, my body began to whisper to me what it had longed to share with me years ago.
"Jenny" it said "you look good, you feel great but something isn't right inside. You need to drop down your guard, as the veneer is cracking. You can't keep it all together any longer".
As my body spoke to me I thanked it for pointing out that I was ignoring it and my soul's true needs. I quietly made an agreement to be true to myself and dig deep to uncover what was festering under the surface, so I could live a life of being true to myself. I would no longer pretend that everything was alright, because it obviously wasn't. At some level there was something seriously out of alignment.
That night before I retired to bed I decided to get some guidance from Doreen Virtue's Messages from your Angels Oracle Cards and to my amazement I intuitively chose the following cards.
Mystique - keep charging ahead and don't take no for an answer. Expect miraculous solutions to appear.
Indriel - You are a light worker. God needs you to shine your Divine light and love - like an angel - upon earth and all of its inhabitants.
Archangel Raphael - I am helping you heal physical challenges in yourself and others you are a healer like me.
Well I couldn't have orchestrated this reading if I tried! I went to bed for a restful night's sleep, knowing I had just received some very valuable "signs".
The following morning, which was in December 2012, I rose and turned on my computer to see an email which read:
ALL YOUR WISHES CAN COME TRUE IN 2013
On the last days of the year forces from beyond are going to be coming into contact with our world and making it possible for amazing miracles to be accomplished: And for you what that means is an opportunity to be granted a great favour: nothing less than fulfilment of all your wishes for the coming year of 2013. So I think you will agree that this is an important and even essential moment for you if you hope to get everything you want next year.
This extremely special time is viewed by all mediums as a magical night. The high energies that are going to be guiding the year 2013 will be concentrated on that night, and the vibration rate will be so powerful that, in terms of magic, anything can happen.
Hallelujah. What a message and certainly confirmation I was on track!
A part of me was still uncertain whether I could heal myself or not. I was still needing more confirmation, so a few days later, whilst lying on the couch at my parent's place, I was looking out the window and I asked for a sign that I was going to heal. Ten minutes later a car pulled up outside with WELLS sign written in huge letters on the side.
It was time to get to the root cause of what created this cancer and with the support of a dear friend, through guided meditation, I uncovered what it was. I was immediately transported back to a past life in France in the 1500's, I felt abject terror as a scene unfolded, revealing that I was being held captive in a cold dark dungeon. As I gazed upwards, daylight seeped through a tiny barred opening, and the muffled chatter of a large crowd gathering above in the village square drifted in. I was not alone in my cell, there were three younger people with me and one of them I recognised was my son in this lifetime. These young ones were my understudies. I was a healer and had been teaching them. In those times this was illegal and thought of as a threat. Healers were seen as people with power, and therefore, feared by the Kings and dignitaries. The solution was to round up healers and make an example of them, by burning them at the stake. I was forced to watch, as one by one, my understudies were burnt before it was finally my turn. No wonder I felt totally responsible for our demise.
This information was such a revelation to me. I understood how I had carried this experience through into this lifetime. During this lifetime I had experienced physical, emotional and sexual abuse and had maintained a deep seated belief that it was all my fault. When these abuses took place, I blamed myself and felt guilty. Consequently I had lived my life putting others' needs before my own. I was the "good" girl, always "trying" to do my best in every situation, without knowing what I wanted. I was forever looking for approval from others, always trying to make things right for everyone else. I totally understood why I developed ovarian cancer. Our ovaries are where we create life and, because of the abuse I had endured, I had shut down the ability to create a life for me and my needs.
Several days following my past life regression I received an email containing a guided meditation about entering the Hall of Records to access the soul's plan. I saw this email as divine assistance and followed the meditation where it was confirmed that my soul had contracted the cancer in order for me to learn to heal myself. I was then to teach others how to heal .
I received much divine inspired guidance, I came to understand that negative thoughts depress the immune system, whereas positive thoughts activate it. This means if you have unresolved grief, resentment, anger or any negative emotions which are caused by negative thoughts, you are highly likely to produce chemicals to suppress immune function. Conversely having hope, laughing and feeling good releases chemicals to improve the immune system. I chose to feel good, whenever possible, to help my immune system do its job.
Part Two will follow next week: The Operation and Beyond.
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